The heavens parted, the seas quieted, the earth stood still. From her womb, the goddess brought forth Chuck Norris, sired by the sun, as a gift to mankind. He reclined upon the fertile soil under the crescent moon and immediately sprouted a beard. She spoke softly to the young child and said “Go forth and roundhouse kick people in the face” So it was spoken and so he does. Every now and then he also sells exercise equipment and wears awesome clothes.
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